Pedestrian Dodgems

It's the holiday season. School holidays. Apart from the daily commute being that much more unbearable, there is an up side to the situation.

Betty is securely attached to the train handrail, so no danger of tumbling. The train is overcrowded (although for some reason, certain of the standing passengers decide to not take the empty seat opposite me – I have showered, honest), and because of this overcrowding, ventilation is minimal – it’s hot.

I digress – this is not the upside.

It’s holiday season, and my daily commute encompasses: a short cycle ride to the train station, from home; a just-enough-time-to-write-a-blog-entry train journey; a longer (but still short) cycle ride to where I work: very near Millennium Point, Birmingham.

It’s holiday season and for those who do not know, Millennium Point houses the ThinkTank – a pseudo science museum populated during term time by young school kids out for the day, on a day trip. During term time... During holiday time it is populated by young school kids, accompanied by one, other or both parents. Lots of them.

Whilst on the subject of the the ThinkTank, I might as well recall a short conversation I had with one of the staff one day. The date was 1^st July 2009. I was due to take part in an activity with The Boy, but wondered if the ThinkTank were also aware of the commercial opportunities of this activity. So I asked: “What are you doing to celebrated the 40^th Anniversary of the Moon Landing?” – to my mind, one of the greatest scientific achievements of the last fifty years (a part from the iPhone, of course). Their response: “Er, is it forty years?”. Enough said. The Boy and me got on with building a 1:144 scale model of the Saturn V, Apollo 11, space rocket and listening to the replayed, in real-time ‘live’ event on the website We Choose the Moon. Heaven.

To get back to the ThinkTank today, these ‘enquirers of science’ have to walk along a cycle/pedestrian route (did I mention the forward thinking Birmingham Council?) and during holiday season, this route takes on The Challenges, which I call Pedestrian Dodgems. You have the walking phone gazer, who could change direction without notice (and not show any signs of navigational awareness); the bus runner (these are more obvious, as they’re likely to be running for the nearest bus stop); the ambler (not in a rush, but also unaware of their surroundings); and, during holiday season, the excited, can-go-anywhere-in the path of the cyclist, pre-schooler (toddler) accompanying their older sibling and parents to said Thinktank – not to mention the chasing mother, ready to dive into the path of any vehicle to save their precious little one (let’s be honest, wouldn’t we all?)

The game is simple really – it’s the reverse of Death Race Two-Thousand ­– you have to avoid contact with any of the aforementioned obstacles to gain points (in fact, any obstacle). You are allowed to ding the bell, use the brakes, change gears, suddenly swerve and anything that you can think of to avoid contact with The Challenges (even SHOUTING, where necessary). For each challenge avoided, a point is awarded.

Today, I got over fifty.